Hooking up regularly with someone is simple. Dating is even easier. There’s a growing level of comfort and compatibility that goes hand-in-hand with an ongoing relationship, be it in the bedroom or anywhere else. One-night stands, however, are an entirely different story.

Your first impression is also your lasting one, so you constantly have to be on your toes, making sure every move you make is right and every maneuver you make ends in sweet moans of ecstasy. Follow this guide and you’ll be back in the shack gettin’ your shag on in no time.

1. Like a lion hunting in the jungle, stalk your prey subtly to let them know you’ve found them and you like what you see. Refrain from mauling and eating them…
at least for now.

2. Approach the target with caution, not acting too cool or too timid. A peace offering of Cosmopolitans will open the door for further investigation. A $2 beer will quickly end your pursuit for the evening.

3. Make like Paula Abdul and needlessly comment about how perfect the target is… even if none of it’s true and you’re just so desperate for action, you’ll take anything you can get. Literally anything…

4. More alcoholic peace offerings, thank you very much.

5. Suggest you two go to a slightly more exclusive club… located on a queen-size mattress in your bedroom.

6. Remember, “there are plenty of fish in the sea” which means move on if suggestion is declined with menacing growl or straight-up slap to the face.

7. Once back at “exclusive club,” make one final peace offering to remove all nervousness from both parties.

8. Use every move in the book. And by “book” we mean “porno videos you’ve watched every single day since you were 12.”

9. Awkwardly share compliments with each other about how good it was or how much you both enjoyed your evening together.

10. Leave. Even if it’s your place… leave.